Six years ago.

Okay, this entry needs a little forward. I found this today while looking over my old inbox.

The scene - one of my best friends and I, at the time, were sleeping over at her house the night before we worked at a renaissance faire. She brought out the alcohol, Godiva White Chocolate Liquer - it was the first time I had drank - and we got a little buzzed. After a few adventures, we got on the computer around 3 or 4am, spit out this poem, complete with typos (she was typing) and sent it off in a mass email to our entire online address books. The next day, at the faire, we would argue about whather it was "big teethy" or "sharp teethy".. as you will see, we were both wrong. In the future months, we would randomly spout off in a verse from this poem. She is now dead to the world, injected with acid and forever stoned, and I have no contact information of her. Here is our orginal piece of work "Drunken Poem".

Don't judge me too badly. Oh, and her name was also "Kate".


SEPTEMBER 20th, 2003


the kates r once together........dun dun DUN
were not smart, but we luv u *smooches* HAHA NOT!... cept to my j and kates' kitty*
and so i sit here
wondering why
i listen to u
and here u cry

u lil brat
u r realy fat
ur monkey is stupid
this poem is poopid

...i hope ur not a druid..

im not drunk,
just a bit tipsy,
im a badass punk
with alot of spunk

....i hope ur not a monk...
(get it-this has a theme!)
luv me for me,
if u dont,
well that sucks,
im out of beer,
and your out of lucks

im surprised i can type
maybe im not ur type,
biut ur my type
and that makes me hyp

...i hope your not a butler......

baby got back,
kangaroos hav a sak,
what did u pack for me?
in that lunch box

is it a banana,
nice smooth and *squishy*?
or is it a monkey,
with cold teethy?

...i hope ur not a monkey...

im not drunk,
just a lil tipsy,
im a badass punk
with alot of spunk

ur my kind of person
am i ur kind of merson?

....i hope u r a person...

u dersen u.

my signature:

'Luv + violence= dead HIPPIES'



Original date: 4-9-09
WGS 350
Journal 1

What is feminism? What is activism? What is the definition for these terms and who is allowed to call themselves one? Does calling yourself one have negative connotations? Can calling yourself a feminist be activism in itself?
During Empowered Women’s Week in February, we held a discussion at an Open Doors meeting about feminism. We didn’t discuss the waves of feminism or notable women in history, or the well-known feminists today. Instead, we opened the discussion by saying “Fill in the blank, ‘Feminism is…’”. No one in the audience (a mix of LGBT men and women of all sexualities, and a couple transpeople) really had a definition for it. There were some comments from people that they knew there have been waves of feminism, and women’s votes, and women’s equality. I had learned and thought about feminism enough at this point to say that feminism can take many forms for different people, ranging from radical feminism, to simply telling someone off for saying “you play like a girl”.

Even though I already understood that feminism can take many forms, [the piece] made me think of what my personal definition of feminism was – and that I really don’t have a definition. So I instead began to think about what it meant to me and how I acted on it. Am I a radical feminist? What’s important to me? Where does being a queer person fit into this? I think I feel like a radical feminist. I feel willing to take extreme steps if need be and will call someone out if they do something unacceptable. I don’t feel like an extremely academic feminist, long texts filled with big words turn me off (even though WGS is one of my majors here), and I think that’s one of the reasons people shy away from feminism and expanding their horizons.

One of the things I’ve been looking into more recently is "equality" and what that means. Do I really want to be equal? Equal to what exactly? Equal pay, equal rights, and equal respect? In the legal aspects (pay, rights), I would want to be equal to a man. But I don’t always know if I would want to be regarded in the same light as a man. I don’t want gender roles to be equal, I would prefer neutralizing. I don’t think anyone should be seen as weak when they cry, I don’t think men should have to act tough or cold all the time, and I don’t think women should have to be mild. So I don’t say equality. It’s a small thing, and probably not important to most people, but someone brought it up to me awhile ago and it really provoked some critical thinking on my part.

I could find agreement in many of the pieces put into the Treichler and Kramarae article, but some stood out (possibly for obvious reasons. “Lesbianism is the solution… Until all women are lesbians there will be no true political revolution” – Jill Johnston. It’s one of those things you can’t help but laugh at, no matter how you feel on the subject of LGBT folk. But it does make you think about how feminism can be associated with lesbianism, and people assuming that if you’re a feminist, you’re also a lesbian, or the other way around. I guess I fall into the stereotype here. I don’t think one was the effect of the other, but I can see how they intersect in my life. As someone who considers their self an activist, I sometimes wonder if I’m doing enough for all parts of my identity – am I spending too much time working for LGBT rights? Am I doing something to help women? Sometimes I wonder if identifying as genderqueer instead of male or female is helpful or detrimental to feminism.

Regardless, I know I consider myself a both a feminist and activist, and that anyone can consider themselves one if they believe that something needs to be changed. I believe in speaking out if something bothers you and speaking up if someone says something off-color, especially if it’s something that they don’t think about saying (“that’s so gay”, “come on man, stop being such a pussy”). The first step is recognizing that something should be done, so I put a lot of thought into small actions and bringing up the topics with people in every day conversation.



While many of the postings that will be on this blog will be a few months old, this one is fresh, on-the-spot rambling.

I know who I am. Not to say there isn't more of me to discover, but I'm not completely in the dark. And, I love who I am. This is where the regular person would go into detail describing who they are, but I won't. If you continue reading this blog after today, you will no doubt discover more about me than I could ever consciously describe about myself.

The blog will contain, though it is not limited to:

School papers: I can't lie, I really love writing for classes. Most of my writings are really good, so when I stumble upon an old one I'm fond of, I'll probably chuck it into here.

Essays: I'm constantly writing essays on every sort of topic. A thought will occur to me and I'll write it on the back of my hand or in the corner of my notes (I'm usually in a non-related college class when inspiration hits) and ramble on my computer later. Some recent ones have included Shane (from The L Word) and cracking open a book spine.

Memoirs: Writing about certain experiences or friendships.

Poetry: Self-explanitory.

Rants/raves: I have strong opinions. You will be subjected to them.

What this is not:

This is not a diary or personal journal. I have one of those. I thought this needed to be separate. This is my world domination journal.

I hope you stick around.